Post placement, boo for doggies, and other random thoughts!

We have made it through our first post-placement visit.  Hooray!  We weren't sure what to expect, and it ended up being pretty painless.  The social worker was very encouraging and we had a good visit.  Abe slept through most of it.  But, I did find a way to motivate the kids to clean hard.  Let me share it with you.  When your 10 year old asks, "Mom, if the social worker thinks our house is too dirty, could she take us away from you?"  Pause thoughtfully and say, "Ummm...no...I don't think so...uhh...it would have to be pretty bad."  Within seconds all of your children will be feverishly working.   Too bad the social worker is only coming 2 more times!

In other news, Isaac had a major asthma episode this weekend.  It was the first time he has needed to use his nebulizer in a couple of years.  It was triggered by a visit to a house that had a dog.  He didn't actually touch the dog, but by the time we left there he had a small wheeze. By the next morning it was worse, and by that night we were considering taking him to the ER.  It was very scary, but we took him to the Dr. first thing Monday morning and he's almost as good as new now.   This is total confirmation that furry animals are NOT in our future!

Several of you have asked what we found out about our Little Miss White Shoes.  It took us a long time to get an answer, but we did find out a little information.  She has actually returned to her biological family.  We are prayerful and hopeful that this is a good place for her to be and we are so glad we were obedient in inquiring.  We can now look at our photos without the constant wondering if she's going to be okay.  

We're gearing up big time for VBS.  Our family does much of our work before the first child ever arrives, so we get to experience VBS for about 3 months. This year we're doing the "Boomerang Express" so everything is down under style.  We're looking forward to spending a week in the Outback!  We heart VBS!

Finally, I'll leave you with a few photos of Abe. This is him with his "toy" of the moment.  It was the diaper basket we keep downstairs.   Anyway, he had dumped the all the diapers out and was dragging it around the house like a puppy on  a leash.  That boy cracks me up!

Bad Blogger

Okay, so I've been a really bad blogger.  I know it.  Every time I leave the house, someone reminds me of it.  It just has not made it to the top of the to-do list in a while.  That is basically for 2 reasons.  One would be that my life has been insanely busy- INSANELY.  The second would be that I have been largely uninspired.  The last time I had "blogging cramp,"  I finally just decided to blog about the ordinary, and after that the floodgates opened.  So, I've decided I'll try that cure again this time.  Here goes my attempt to break through, basically an overview of our last month with some photos thrown in.

Since my last post, we've had several events.  First, the kids and I made the first 7 hour trip to KY since Abe's arrival. To spend 5 days with my in-laws.  Without Ryan.  Yes, I am insane.  But, Ryan had to be out of town, so the alternative was that same period at home without Ryan, and I thought the change in zip code might do us all well.  The travel went great- much better than I expected.  Abe got to meet lots of extended family, including Ryan's grandmother.  It was a pleasant visit, and I'm glad we took the time to go.

We've had two snow events- one in KY and one in NC.  This makes 4 snow experiences this winter.  That's one for every year we didn't have any.  Lily, who had no snow memories has decided that she has had enough, she said she's ready for it to be done!  Abe hated the snow.  He wanted nothing to do with it, except for trying to eat the snow off of the floor that everyone else tracked in!

Our snow was followed by a snap of gorgeous weather.  Ryan took the kids out for the afternoon last Sunday to a local "botanical garden."  They enjoyed the sunshine and I enjoyed the quiet house.

Isaac turned 7 and we had a pirate party to celebrate.  It was very fun.  I had a great time planning and preparing for it, it was just the distraction I needed from the crazy pace of life.

The thing that has taken much of our time and emotional energy for the last month has been our church.  Like many non-profits, we have been struggling with finances.  The leadership has been praying for approximately a year about the possibility of having to cut some staff.  Finally, about 2 weeks ago, the decision was made and lots of job shifts, changes, and cuts occured.  Ryan lost two of his children's ministry staff.  It has been very difficult for our family.  Largely because these are people that we love and respect and it's painful to have to lose them- especially during such a scary economic time.  Also, because it effects the way we minister to our beloved church and community.  We're having to figure out what is a priority, what can be done differently or more efficiently, and what most deserves our energy.   We've been questioning ourselves, our calling, our effectiveness, etc.  It's one of those times when we are so thankful for God's word and his promises.  We know that when it all sifts out, there are a few things that we KNOW to be true, and that is what really matters in the end.

Abe is doing well.  We continue to have good days and bad days.  The bad days are fewer and farther between, and for that we are grateful.  He is now napping regularly, which has helped to restore some sanity to me.  

He is a very funny little guy and we enjoy the laughter he's brought to our house.  He is also a very determined and opinionated little fellow, and that provides a true challenge.  My biggest frustration continues to be wondering if I am responding to him appropriately.  I am trying very hard to balance a desire to make him feel secure and loved with setting boundaries about appropriate behaviors.  It's a juggle to be sure.

He continues to love "real" things much better than toys.  Telephones, remote controls, aluminum foil rolls- these are the things he loves.  He especially loves things that are much too big for him.  When preparing for Isaac's party, I actually strolled him all through Party City holding a wrapping paper roll in each hand.  He was content.  We looked like a wide load, but he was content!  I've included pictures of his favorite garage discovery- a very large stick that he loves to drag around (don't worry, we make sure he's supervised).  He looks  a little like a mini-Moses when he takes off with it.  He is nothing if not determined!

One Month and We're Getting the Hang of It!

I imagine most every job comes with it's perks.  For some folks it's cruises, dinner parties, or freebies.  Ryan's job comes with its perks as well.  For example, do you get invited to the new members luncheon at your church EVERY month?  I do.  Do you get first dibs on which VBS class you'll teach EVERY year?  I do.   One of my favorite perks is the unlimited access to all of the newest children's church music.  We have an extensive collection of kids music that we've collected through the years.  Recently, Ryan brought home a new CD.  It's become my favorite new dancing CD.  It's funny, but often those kids songs minister to me in very vivid ways.  The first couple of weeks after Abe came home, when I was sitting on the edge of sanity, one of the songs on that new CD was a huge source of encouragement for me.

So, when I decided to post a montage of our first month at home, I knew I had to use that song.  We've made it through the first month and I do believe we're finally getting the hang of it.   Here are a few pictures of a first month with Abe.  Enjoy!

Photo and video editing at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Ups and Downs

It's hard to believe that we've been home almost a month.  Abe is adjusting very well, and seems to be a very content little guy.  We are learning to communicate better and he is so much fun.  He laughs often and loves to "sing" along with music.   

He still LOVES the broom.  I can't sweep while he's awake without him screaming at my feet. Friday I forked over $10 for a toy broom.  It was in the shape of a cow and as soon as I brought it home he smiled.  He pointed to the eyes and said EYES! with great delight.  He then began happily sweeping.  UNTIL I got out my real yellow broom.  Then, he immediately dropped the cow and began pulling on my yellow broom.  Oh, the joys of toddlers!

I must admit that adjusting to a toddler has been much rougher than I'd anticipated.  I guess I'm just not as young as I used to be and I did not realize how independent my other children had become.   I had forgotten what it was like to get to 4 pm and still be in my pajamas wondering if and when I might get a shower.  Truth told, it's been a little overwhelming. Everytime I think the worst of it is over, we seem to hit a rough day.  But, when I get really frustrated I try to take a minute to just sit down and enjoy him.   I know it will get easier soon- it's already getting easier.  It's just hard to remember that when you're stepping in that sticky spot you meant to mop up three days ago.  

Oh well, there's nothing eternal about sparkling floors, right?  In eternity my floors will sparkle-  I feel confident!

Our current prayer requests would be:

Abe's skin.  He still is having this occasional rash thing.  We've had a variety of diagnoses, and we're not sure exactly what it is.  We can get it under control for a while, and then when we think it's gone it flairs up again.  We're on a new medicine and we go back to the dermatologist in 2 weeks.

Our schooling.  It's time for us to crack down again, and the dynamics are still very rough.  I think this is one of my major sources of stress- which of course makes everyone stressed. Please pray for wisdom for me and self-discipline for my children.  When they decide to take initiative with their school work, it helps tremendously!

I'll leave you with a little guessing game about our past week:

Guess who...

Lost their first tooth, battled strep throat, and got his first penicillin shot?

ISAAC

Signed all of her own Valentine's for the first time this year?

LILY

Constantly wants to be with Abe and is very excited about the new song she learned at praise team practice this week?

LIZZY

Turned 16 months old, received his greencard, and actually napped in his crib 3 times?

ABE

Thought it would be great fun to pile in and exceed the weight limit on the pack and play?

ABBY

Bought his wife a gorgeous writing desk and chair on a killer sale and then set it all up beautifully as a very sweet Valentine surprise?

THE BEST HUSBAND A GIRL COULD HAVE

(that would be Ryan!)

Did you get them all correct?  I knew you would!  Have a great day!  Christy

The White Shoes

When you look at this picture, what do you see?  I'll tell you what I see.  I am overwhelmed by those white shoes.  I think of the sweet face of the child that wore them and how proud she was of those shoes.  I think about how she only whispered when she spoke to me and how she clung to my hand while we were there that day.  I think about how I scolded the boys who pushed her off the swing when they thought no one was looking and how she smiled when I lifted her back on and gave her a push.  I wonder if she has a momma coming to get her.  I pray she does.

I have thought about her every day since we returned from Ethiopia.  I thought maybe it was just me.  But then, last night I overheard a conversation between my Ryan and Abby and I knew I wasn't the only one who was struggling with this burden for little H.  So, I decided we just had to know.  We had to be sure that she was going to have a family.  We e-mailed our caseworker this morning and requested that they just check.  Follow up for us and make sure that someone is coming soon.  She assured us they would find out.

I feel sure someone is, right?  Someone has to be.  We can't.  Realistically, we can't.  But, I have to know.  I will sleep better at night knowing.   So, I'll wait to hear what the in-country staff finds out, and I'll pray, and in the meantime, you can pray.  Please pray for little H, with the white shoes.   

Ethiopia photos

I know I have woven some ET photos in with my posts, but I wanted to share a few more.  So, I made this montage which shows a little more of our trip, from start to finish.  These photos can not possibly communicate the beauty of the people and the culture or the depth of the poverty and need.  So many of my favorite photos are of the children we met there, and I am not allowed to post their faces due to regulations.  However, I thought I'd share some of the other photos we took, in the order they were taken.  Enjoy!

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

A few last travel notes

Just wanted to take a minute to share a few last travel thoughts with some of you families that will be traveling in the coming months.  These are basically just random thoughts that I thought might be helpful.  So, here goes:

Packing:

I used Grace's travel spreadsheets for my planning.  Especially the packing lists.  For the most part, I packed exactly what she had listed and we pretty much had everything we needed.  I did add a few feeding type items because Abe was 15 months and he was at that in-between eating stage.  I HIGHLY recommend the Playtex drop-in liner bottles.  I hesitated about buying them, because I knew he wouldn't be in bottles long, but they were exactly right for the travel situation.  The conditions for cleaning and sanitizing were not good at any point of our travels, so the drop-ins were perfect.  Also, I took a set of feeding bowls with lids that we used constantly.  We packed them for going out, we used them for mixing up Abe's rice cereal, they held a variety of snack items on the plane.  They were a must.  I also took Gerber finger snacks and I'm glad I did.  They were lifesavers on the plane.  The milk, baby cereal, and jarred food were all readily available in the Ethiopian supermarkets, but the finger foods were less available.

 A few little items I'm really glad we packed:

• Extra ziplocs- especially the gallon size
  
• Plastic formula container (worked great with the powdered milk too.)
  
• Slipper socks for all of us (all of the floors are tile or wood)
  
• A variety of small toys- especially the bubbles and the ball
• Bibsters (disposable bibs)
• Washcloths 
• Travel size clorox wipes and kleenexes

Items I wish I'd packed:

• More socks for Abe.   He went through about 3 pairs a day and they got filthy.
  
• More long pants for Abe.  The weather there was much milder than I'd anticipated.  I packed too many summery clothes and a spring weight was more what we needed.
  
• Disposable dishcloths (the kind with the dish soap in them.)

  

A few final travel thoughts:

• We flew Emirates and we had a great experience.  I highly recommend using them if you can and the forced layover in Dubai on the way there was great.  We arrived in Addis fairly rested and ready to meet Abe.  The equipment was in excellent condition and the crew were ultra professional and caring.
• Use your driver as a great resource.  Our driver was wonderful.  He educated us on the culture, took us to the best restaurants, markets, etc., helped us exchange money, picked up water and other items, and overall he was our lifeline for the week.   
• Realize that your experience will be different than how you have pictured it.  The process is constantly changing and things may not go exactly as you have imagined.  The Gladney in-country staff juggles a lot of responsibilities.  No two travel groups are going to experience the same exact things.  For example, we have no video of our first meeting with Abe.  I thought someone would be available to video because I had seen so many other videos, but that was not the case.  We had to choose either video or photo because there was only one set of hands available.  There were a couple of other small things like that which I had to get over in order to enjoy the moment.  
• Take time to enjoy it all.  You will get tired and it is all very emotional.  But try hard to soak it all in.  Take photos, video, and linger when you can.  You'll be glad you did!

I guess from this point on, my blog will be more about my family and less about my adoption journey.  We invite you to continue checking in or even to e-mail me if I can help any of you other adoptive parents.  I know I had a gazillion questions when I actually had the travel dates on the calendar.  We look forward to blogging about our wacky life as we continue this transition from 6 to 7!